Movie Limericks
The Boyz got hepped up on Irish whiskey the other night and started spouting out movie descriptions in limerick form. The next morning (hepped up on Alka-Seltzers) we wrote down the ones we could remember. How many movies can you name? |
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| 1. |
The planets were oddly aligned,
When a man made a most bizarre find.
He found a small door
That led straight to the core
of a popular thespian's mind. |
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"Being John Malkovich" |
| 2. |
There once was a stallion from Philly,
Who loved to beat meat that was chilly.
He needed some dough,
So he shouted out, "Yo!
I'll just go slap Apollo Creed silly!" |
| |
"Rocky" |
| 3. |
Here's a recipe, simple and quick:
Take some Wiest and a pinch of Patric,
Stir in some side stories,
Add a couple of Coreys,
And voila! It's a vampire flick! |
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"The Lost Boys" |
| 4. |
When his plane hit a storm and crash-landed,
This man found that he had been stranded.
All signs pointed toward
Yet another award,
But the Oscars left him empty-handed. |
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"Cast Away" |
| 5. |
A rich man whose marriage was wrecked
Went to college to gain intellect.
With help from his son,
He got the job done,
And he no longer gets no respect. |
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"Back to School" |
| 6. |
A lad with a gift like his pop's,
Sick and tired of tending the crops,
Joined an old geezer's crew
When he lost Aunt Beru,
And since then has been earning much props.
|
| |
"Star Wars" |
| 7. |
Here's a story your kids will enjoy,
'Bout a mischievous hand-crafted toy,
Whose nose would extend
Cuz he lied to no end.
When he stopped, he became a real boy. |
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"Pinocchio" |
| 8. |
Three babes who had bodies sublime,
Got their kicks fighting all sorts of crime.
With great camera tricks,
Lifted from the Matrix,
The movie's a rocking good time. |
| |
"Charlie's Angels" |
| 9. |
The scene in Detroit was not pretty.
The crime rate had climbed above shitty,
So the cops built a droid
That went out and destroyed
All the evil that lurked in the city. |
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"Robocop" |
| 10. |
It's never surprising to see
A bad Sandler film on the marquee.
But how in the hell
Did he sign on Keitel
For this God-awful suck-ass movie? |
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"Little Nicky" |
| 11. |
Jeffrey Dahmer would call this a winner,
But it's sure to make some people thinner.
When their airplane went "Crunch!",
Needing something to munch,
The survivors had family for dinner. |
| |
"Alive" |
| 12. |
A boy saw the dead with his eyes,
So they hired a shrink to advise.
At the end it's a shock
When we learn that the doc
Had some years ago met his demise. |
| |
"The Sixth Sense" |
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